Your 2016 Horoscope

It might surprise you to know that us potato-heads are huge horoscope people. We follow them religiously in order to know everything from how our work month will turn out to if the new guy one of us is dating is “compatible” (An Aries and a Cancer? Dream on). It’s why we were happy to discover The AstroTwins, aka Tali and Ophira Edut, the identical twins who are astrologists to the stars in their own right. We asked them how to start 2016 strong, and the astro-logical way (get it?), and here’s what they had to say…

New Year’s Resolutions & New Practices for Every Zodiac Sign

Aries:

Sure, you have all the answers, Aries…or do you? Pause before jumping in with defensive words, judgment or a quick fix. Ask questions and listen—REALLY listen. 2016 is all about cleaning up your own backyard instead of sneering at the busted lawn chairs and pink plastic flamingos in someone else’s. Say it with us (even if you don’t yet believe it), “I’m okay, you’re okay.”

Taurus:

Pause your response time, Taurus, and see how long you can wait before reacting. Hold. It. In. You’re used to begging forgiveness more than asking permission (when your pride actually allows you to beg, that is). Alas, this has resulted in one too many bull-in-china-shop messes. Caution: You could burn serious bridges this year with your knee-jerk moves. Bite your tongue and you’ll hang your head less in 2016. Channel that passion into memorable sex or a divinely inspired creative project.

Gemini:

Feelings…nothing more than feelings? Don’t be so quick to dismiss yours in 2016, Gemini. Explore the patinas and complexities of your inner landscape and your relationships could become surprisingly rich. Just remember: being in touch with your emotions is not the same thing as being self-absorbed. Cultivate a level of self-awareness that allows you to be present with people. This year, practice “loving the one you’re with” instead of looking over your shoulder for a shiny new upgrade.

Cancer:

In the great “head versus heart” debate, the old ticker always trumps logic for you, o’ sensitive one. But not in 2016, Crab. This year, pause for the cerebral cause and coolly assess your moves before letting intuition seize the wheel. That said, you’ll need to watch out for analysis paralysis. The goal is not to overthink, but to weigh the pros and cons of every choice. This way, you won’t freak out that you’ve made a mistake and drag everyone on an emotional rollercoaster.

Leo:

One more shiny bauble? Nuh-uh, Leo. In 2016, less is definitely more. Send your inner tchotchke collector to winter in Scottsdale and let yourself be overtaken by a refined minimalist ethos. Somewhere in the vast grey zone between “barren” and “blinged to death” lies your new 2016 sensibility. Start asking yourself, “Do I REALLY need this?”

Virgo:

For Virgos, 2016 commands, “Thou shalt not overfunction.” This is the year of YOU, as lucky Jupiter is in your sign until September, which hasn’t happened since 2004. Yes, you need to set boundaries. But rather than bog yourself down with self-righteous conversations about “healthy limits,” here’s a better idea: Get SO busy with your own amazing endeavors that you simply don’t have time to caretake and enable.

Libra:

It’s so unFAIR (your buzzword) that people say Libras are flaky, flighty and off in the clouds. But wait—doesn’t that sound kind of fun? At least for the first nine months of this year, embrace your inner dreamer. Let your intuition pull you along instead of endlessly deliberating the options. To avoid pissing off half the world, don’t promise anything you can’t 100 percent deliver. You’ve got cosmic license to say, “Let me get back to you on that.”

Scorpio:

You’ve got a long list of things you “don’t do,” Scorpio—and near the top of that is being a joiner. Let’s turn these policies on their head in 2016. You need friends…and weird ones who convince you to try things beyond your comfort zone. If your signmate Hillary Clinton could take selfies with Kim K and do the “nay nay” in 2015, then surely you can embarrass yourself in the name of experimentation. Let go and have fun—your reputation isn’t worth THAT much.

Sagittarius:

Luck and charisma have always saved your ass, but in 2016, it’s time to stop relying on such risky insurance policies. This year, your usual tricks won’t dig you out of any setbacks or challenges. The only solution is to fix the foundation and strengthen the core of your most important areas of life. As we once heard a cheesy motivational speaker say, “The roots create the fruits.” This is gospel truth for you now, Sag.

Capricorn:

Hard work pays off, but in 2016, you could be crowned the unlikely king or queen of “woo.” Your spiritual and adventurous sides are cosmically energized, so let your inner Marco Polo or Marianne Williamson guide you through the year. Sign up for classes, take a trip, learn to meditate. Take a deeper-than-The-Secret swipe at the Law of Attraction and allow the universe to “co-create” with you. Your new 2016 hashtag: #manifest.

Aquarius:

Yes, it happens to be an election year in the U.S., Aquarius, but unless you’re legit running for office, it’s time to stop being such a damn politician. Instead of spreading yourself around like avocado on gluten-free toast at a Paleo banquet, focus on deepening a few intimate ties. No “OMG guys thanks for 60 million followers!” humblebrags for you this year. In fact, you might even want to deactivate a couple of those accounts.

Pisces:

The term “people pleasing” is a funny one, because it never really pleases YOU, Pisces. And, well, you’re a person too—so in 2016, it’s time to start acting like it. Remind yourself that “no” is a complete sentence, even if you have to put that two-letter word on Post-Its all over your house. Imagine the incredible things you’ll be able to say “yes” too once you declutter your life of guilty and uninspiring obligations.

AstroTwins’ 2016 Planetary PlannerGet your complete AstroTwins 2016 horoscope for life, love, career, health and more. Take an exclusive 30% off The AstroTwins’ Planetary Planner ebook with the gift code ‘2016.’

Read Gabrielle Bernstein’s tips on how to be more mindful or check out how to be more positive.